Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Normalizing.

Miss Paige Ruby
No cavities!
Things in the Clark house are normalizing.  It's a new normal.  It's chaotic, loud, fun, loud, busy, exhausting, hilarious, loud, exciting and loud.  Three kids in four years is humorous.  If you don't stop and laugh then you will go nuts!  I feel like everywhere I go people are laughing at me so I've decided to join them!  Let me give you a little example of what I'm talking about.  Yesterday I took the kids to Target.  I could just sit home all day but I choose to get out there in the real world and see what kind of trouble I can get myself into.  Anyways, Target.  I love Target.  Everybody knows this about me but let me just admit right here and now that I love Target a whole lot less with three kids in tow.  Here is a visual:  Easton in the  back of the cart, Paige strapped in the front to prevent her from jumping out, Carter supposed to be holding on to the cart or riding on the back.  Oh, No.  While I was looking for a tank top Carter took the liberty of hiding in all the clothes racks and cracking himself (and Paige) up.  Obviously we quickly vacated that section.  There were many other little episodes including a trip to the bathroom (of course!) and we ended with one package of gumballs scattered across three check out lines!  Ahh... all in a days work:)  This my friends, is what dreams are made of.  Truly.  All my life I would think about myself at the age of 30.  It's kind of a monumental age and I always just wondered where I'd be, who I'd be with and what I would be doing.  I can honestly say that this is exactly what I had in mind.  I'm a lucky girl.


Up next, Disney World!  Yes, we are crazy.  We get a little bit of normalcy and routine in our life and we like to see what we can do to rock the boat.  The two big kids are thrilled and counting down how many "sleeps" until we leave.  I can't wait to see their faces.  Look out Florida, the Clark's are coming.  Us and Hurricane Irene.  I'm not sure which is scarier for that state.  Should be crazy fun.  These are memories of a lifetime and I cannot wait for it.  I can however wait to fly with Paige...that should be an adventure all on its own.  Love that girl.  Giddy up!


2 years ago.
Here is the big news...Mama's going back to work!  I have been off since January 15.  Yup, that long.  Pregnancy and babies are no joke over here.  I'm actually ready.  I think.  I give all the credit in the world to stay at home Mom's.  It's hard!  I like to work.  I like having a purpose outside my home.  I know I am needed there and love being home but I also like to be out of the house.  I'm going back three days a week so I still feel like I will have plenty of time at home as well.  The weird part is going to be leaving Easton.  I've never had to leave a baby because they always get to come with me.  How ironic that I end up with a baby that can't go to daycare!  The doctors recommended that he stay out for 6 months to a year to give his body plenty of time to heal.  I'm never away from him but at least I know I will only be 5 minutes away and will have lunch with him each day.  We can do this.  


Gratitude, once again.  You know my favorite word.  I'm still overwhelmed with the outpouring of support from people in our lives.  This past week I received an awesome gift from girls I went to college with.  Many of them I have very little contact with except through Facebook.  I can't tell you what it means to me to know there are people out there pulling for us and wishing us well.  Thank you, girls!  I promise to pay it forward.  People like you- push me to be a better person.  Forever grateful.


Lovin' Tummy Time.
Easton update:  He is Super Baby!  He finally hit 10 pounds at 13.5 weeks.  He eats pretty well (most of the time) and refuses to sleep thru the night.  He is super smiley and he loves to look around and check out the world.  I still can't get the images of him so sick out of my mind but at least I have images of his smiling face to go along with them.  Everyday I thank my lucky stars for all the people that took care of him.  God Bless the Hurley NICU doctors and nurses.  We love them all!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

For the Mommies...

This post is for the Mommies of little ones.  I said this blog would be about what was happening in my life and THIS is happening in my life.  I know many people wont relate but just as many will.  This issue of breast feeding has been bugging me lately.


To breast feed or not? What the heck is with this stigma attached to breast feeding these days?  Four years ago when I had Carter, I chose to nurse him because I wanted the bonding experience and I felt it was best for him.  Same with Paige.  That was it.  I wasn't aware of any stigma about it and I never really even considered anybody else's feelings about it.  My kid, my body, my milk, my business.  Right?  Wrong!  Lately it seems like people raise an eyebrow if you don't breast feed your baby.  Wait- lets back up.  Why is one of the first questions out of peoples mouths when you have a baby, "Are you nursing?"  How does this affect anyone else's life except to pass judgement?  You cannot tell me that some of my friends who use formula love their kids less than I love mine.  I just don't buy into that.  I also don't think that they want less for their kids than I do.  It's a personal choice shaped by many reasons and situations.  If you have read my blog before- you know I am an open book.  I will tell you just about anything because I don't believe in hiding your experiences.  In fact, I think its beneficial.  Here is my situation and why this topic is prevalent.  I'm not a new Mom.  Easton is my third baby and also the third baby I have chose to breast feed.  This situation is so different this time.  For one, Easton wasn't fed any milk until he was almost 3 weeks old because he was so sick which meant I just had to pump around the clock to even keep my milk coming.  All you Mom's who pump know what a joy that was!  Now we are home and he isn't a great eater.  It is a major struggle.  He isn't great at the bottle and I'm not able to nurse him at all anymore because it is too much effort and he won't take more than an ounce from me before falling asleep.  I figured this out the hard way by taking him to the doctor and finding he wasn't gaining any weight.  He is still very small for his age and gaining as.slow.as.a.snail!  (He weighs at 12 weeks what my other two weighed at 4 weeks.)  That said, I have to pump every meal.  Might not seem like a big deal but in my world it is.  I have Paige.  Paige enjoys taking off her clothes and going outside while I pump.  She also enjoys dumping cereal on the floor or demanding she's "firsty" the moment I sit down.  I can't exactly stop pumping once I start to re-dress her, get her a drink and clean up the cereal.  This causes chaos with Carter.  He tries to do these things for me and the next thing I know I have two fighting kids and a screaming/hungry baby all while I'm trying to take the 10 minutes to pump then next bottle.  I'm exhausted just thinking about this and it happens...5 times a day:)  Then there is the car pumping.  No, I don't pump and drive- although I have considered it. I like to pump while Matt drives because it's a time saver.  We have to be in the car and that is useless time so I might as well make it useful and make a bottle.  Matt thinks this is nuts.  He is getting better about it now but still looks at me like I may have lost my mind!  The next issue is that I am pretty thin from all the stress and could probably benefit from not giving him all my calories...which doesn't seem to be bulking him up anyway!  Then there is the immunity factor.  Easton needs the antibodies from me to help him fight off infection and stay healthy.  Umm- being strictly breast fed he still ended up in the hospital from a virus nobody I even know had.  My antibodies apparently suck.  Are you getting my point?  It's that there are circumstances in people life that shape their decision.  Please don't judge them.  Being a Mom is hard enough- we all do our best and don't need anybody else's opinion (unless asked) to make it more difficult.


As for me, I am still nursing pumping and bottle feeding all but one feeding a day which I supplement with a high calorie, high protein formula to help plump him up.  However,  I'm thinking about stopping (gasp!)  I have 150 bags of frozen milk to use up and then I plan to switch to only NeoSure which is the formula recommended for him.  I may stop tomorrow, next week, next month, or in 9 months.  The guilt I have about stopping is my own issue.  Fortunately I am pretty confident in my parenting decisions and will ultimately do what I feel is best for my family and myself.  Some people have a harder time or are less secure in their decisions so lets all cut a little slack and try to give new Mom's a break!  Lets support what is best for each person as opposed to what society THINKS is best.  


For the record:  I 100% encourage breast feeding but I also support formula...with no judgement!


Moving on...  Life at the Clark's is still nuts.  It's getting easier all the time but its still nuts.  Sleep is super rare in this house.  Easton has no consistency.  Two nights ago he got up once and last night four times.  No rhyme or reason.  It's just Easton and we all know by now that Easton marches to his own drum!  So last night...Easton got up four times then Paige wakes up crying and comes in my bed.  The crying woke up Carter so he came in.  Pretty awesome night getting up 6 times in my whole 7 hours of being in bed!  Matt tried to tell me that one day I will look back and wish I was still getting up with babies.  Matt is wrong.  There are a lot of things I will miss about these times but never in a million years will it be giving up my beauty sleep!  
All Clean!


Shaving Cream Fun at School
Paige is the cutest thing I have ever seen.  She is also the sassiest.  I want to punish her and I do put her in timeout but I gotta admit- I like her style.  A little sweet, a lot of sass, a bit innocent and enough guts to stand up for herself at all times.  She is talking like crazy and likes to tell jokes.  Unfortunately, her punch line is always "Betause."  She may need some new jokes but her delivery will make you smile anyway.


Carter is growing up.  Its sad.  He likes to say things to me like, "You know I will be 14 one day, right?"  Really?  No doubt.  He knows how to rub it in.  Even though he is the oldest and can be rather moody, I think he is the sweetest.  He loves me so much.  I can't get enough of that and all the sweet things he says.  For example, "Mom, you look like an angel today."  Love him!


Easton is actually doing pretty good.  Besides the whole hating to eat issue- he has been so much better.  He is acting like a real baby.  Finally.  He loves to lay on the floor and kick and cannot get enough of looking at himself in the mirror.  He knows he has got the looks and he has no issue admiring himself.  He is growing slowly but at least he is growing.  He seems more comfortable lately and I just love him to pieces.  He also has the smile down pat!








Lazy Day


12 weeks, baby.