Sunday, May 19, 2013

Miracle by definition.


Definition of MIRACLE

1
: an extraordinary event manifesting divine intervention in human affairs
2
: an extremely outstanding or unusual event, thing, or accomplishment
3
Christian Science : a divinely natural phenomenon experienced humanly as the fulfillment of spiritual law

I've witnessed a miracle.  May 21, 2011 around 5pm.  This day hurts.  Its been two years but as I type this my shoulders are tighter than they should be, my stomach doesn't feel right and my breathing is a little quicker than it probably needs to be.  Seems like decades ago but feels like moments ago.  The images are clear.  It plays as a movie in my mind.  I know what people were wearing, I hear there voices and I know exactly what my husband looked liked slumped over in that blue chair.  I remember the team working on my son giving firm and direct orders to one another.  I remember people with very serious faces moving so quickly and efficiently yet not looking too panicked.  I remember the air in the room- it felt stuffy yet I was kind of cold and a little sweaty.  I remember what Easton looked like even though I could only glance a few times as I was only strong enough to keep my back to him and watch Matt's face to understand what was happening.  He was gray.  He was limp.  And, he didn't look alive. I remember other staff members offering me a chair and water.  I remember the look in their eye, the look that said a million "I'm sorry's" for what was about to happen.  I knew it was happening.   There was a window a few feet away that had a lovely view of a parking garage.  I paced back and forth from Matts chair to the window chanting to God, "Please don't take my baby.  Please don't take my baby.  Please don't take my baby," over and over and over again.   I heard the doctor say that he had 15 minutes to come around or they were air lifting him to another hospital, I also heard that he wouldn't survive that flight.  I wanted to believe he would survive but I could read the monitors and I could see what he looked like and so I asked someone if I should call the family... and they said yes.  This sounds crazy but in that moment I felt relieved.   Relieved that I had a task.  Relieved that I could possibly not be in the room to watch him die.  Or possibly even that by  my leaving, he could go because I had a feeling that little boy was fighting so hard for his Mama.  I don't know what the relief was but I felt something and a huge rush of adrenaline.  A crazy rush, almost like someone injected something directly into me.  I was shaking, my brain was racing, I felt outside my body and I remember it so well.  I left the unit and went into the parent room where my sister was waiting and told her to "Call the family.  Pack up the room.  This is it."  Thats all I said.  I cannot even imagine what was going through her mind.  As she started to call my parents, I made one call to my mother-in-law and just said "You need to come here now," no other questions were asked.  I went back into the unit to watch my baby pass.  As difficult as that is to type or say, its truly what I thought was going to happen.  I braced myself.  I had only been gone about 3 minutes but something happened while I was gone.  The stats had stopped dropping.  They were still bagging him and working fiercely but things looked like they weren't deteriorating further.  I held onto Matt and watched.  All of a sudden, numbers were rising.  He was less gray.  Someone smiled.  Voices lowered.  I don't know who said it, but someone said, "He's ok.  For right now."  I PROMISE YOU, there is absolutely, positively no reason that happened.  Nothing changed in those last 3 minutes.  It was a miracle.  Divine Intervention.  An extraordinary event.  A life changing moment.  

We stayed with our son for another thirty minutes while they got him hooked back up to all of his regular machines and then we walked out to see an entire waiting room of our loved ones waiting to hear the terrible news.  Waiting to try to offer support in a darkest hour.  I couldn't speak.  Matt couldn't speak without crying. I did finally blurt out that he was Ok until we got our bearings and Matt told the story of our little fighters biggest fight.

This upcoming date was hard for me last year.  I was unexpectedly really sad on May 21.  I didn't realize the weight it held still to this day.  Mainly because Easton's fight was far from over after this episode.  He actually had several other close calls but this was the first and the worst.  It was nothing short of life changing.  My beliefs, my faith, my priorities and my soul all changed on the evening of May 21, 2011.  Easton is my hero.  He may only be two years old but he is the strongest, most willful human being I have ever met.  I can only dream of having half his strength one day.  I will forever be grateful for the life lessons my 3 day old son taught me.  He changed my world, my family and my life.  This year, I'm going to try not to be sad on May 21, rather think of it as the day I witnessed a living, breathing miracle.

Saturday, May 18, 2013

Team Easton 2013

Team Easton Gives Back 2013, raised over $32,000!!!!  This means that in only two events we have raised almost $60,000 for the Hurley Medial Center's Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.  Wow.  Those numbers blow me away.  It all started with a thankful Mama who wanted to give back.  Combine that with selfless, awesome, giving people to join me in paying it forward and you end up really making a difference.  I'm not typically at a loss for words but I'm not really sure how to even find appropriate sentiments to match how I feel about this event.   The thank yous are a necessity.  First and foremost, thank you to the Hurley NICU for saving my son.  His fragile life would not have survived without each and everyone of you doing your very best on any particular day you touched our Easton.  He's a big deal and he's going places...just wait and see!  Thank you to Elga Credit Union for giving us our first corporate sponsorship!  Thank you, Iva @ Affairs to Remember for turning the ballroom into the most gorgeous space imaginable.  You work too hard and are so supportive of our event.  Thank you.  Thank you to Hicks Studio in Fenton for our invitations, Gerych's for gorgeous centerpieces for the second year in a row and to Cakes by Sarah for our delicious deserts!  Still Rain, you are great performers and we are so grateful you provide such great entertainment!  Thank you, Jodie Cooper for making our auction so pretty.  Also, special thanks to our families, my Mama, Kim, Raechel and Nathan P., and every other person who helped or supported Team Easton in anyway.  We cannot do this alone- YOU made a huge difference.

The party was so much fun and we had about 30 people from Hurley come to celebrate with us.  If you couldn't make the party this year- we will see you next.  Amie Akers donates her time and talent to capture our event.  Here are some pictures to preserve the evening.  Thank you, Amie!
The man of the hour.



Hurley represents!
Wingmen




Even the news came:)


Listening to Mama speak.
The Mom's
"I'm a miracle!"



We Love Roberta!
"My Patty"








NICU nurses and a couple Mama's