Thursday, December 6, 2012

Road Trip

"Hey, Matt.  Let's take a road trip for 10 hours with a one, three and five year old!"  "Sure, that sounds like a genius idea!"  This conversation may or may not have taken place.

Road trip. Hmm.  This is an unfamiliar word to me.  The last road trip I was on was when I was eight.  We went on a trip to Florida and never, ever again did we drive.  To be honest, if you have met my father- you are probably surprised we even did it once.  He is a man with a lot of energy and him in a car with all of us... ha!  You can imagine how well that went.  Matt, on the other hand, drove to Florida many times growing up so he felt 10 hours was totally do-able.  Before I launch into the more humorous events of our vacation- let me just say that we had a great time.  We knew going into this that it wouldn't be a piece of cake but we had some awesome family time and and were surrounded by the most beautiful scenery imaginable.

NOT sleeping.
Our Captain was really good looking.


We were supposed to leave early Wednesday morning for our trip but we were a little anxious and decided to head out Tuesday night with hopes of knocking a few hours out with the kids asleep.  The plan was to drive as far as we could and then stop at a hotel to sleep and just have a few hours remaining in the morning.  As we began our journey we had to make not one, but two stops in the first 28 miles- I was a tad fearful of what was to come.  My first important lesson learned is that children don't grasp the idea of "trying" to go potty.  As Carter put it, "Why would I go in the bathroom if I don't have the feeling.  That's just weird."  Touche, my son.  That very reason was demonstrated a few miles later:)  The boys fell asleep fairly quickly but Paige decided she was NOT sleeping on this road trip.  That girl is stubborn but she was good so it worked out.  We got all the way to Lexington, KY before stopping and found a hotel.  This is where all the fun began.  What we didn't think about when deciding to head out early is that a 5 hour "nap" in the car might mean the kids aren't tired anymore by the time we are.  So picture this:  Matt and I are so tired that we can hardly keep our eyes open. We find a hotel and cannot wait to just crash for a few hours.  We quietly get the boys and Paige into the hotel room and slide them into bed.  It took about 4 seconds before the giggles erupted.  Not only were these kids NOT tired- they were hungry, thirsty and ready to party.  Easton has never laughed so hard in his life.  He was shouting random things out and cracking up which made the others crack up.  Carter just wasn't tired anymore and Paige loves a good hotel so she had things she wanted to do.  We were trying to be good sports but about 4 HOURS after getting to the hotel and still not sleeping, Matt was mad he spent money on a hotel since he couldn't sleep and I stormed down to the front desk like a crazy person and asked the guy if there was any amount of money I could give him to find me some milk for my obnoxious baby!  I should have been embarrassed... but I wasn't.  Not even a little.  I was desperate.  I believe everyone fell asleep about 4:45 and we were back up and out by 6:00.  The kids were OK for the three hour trip we had left but they were excited so there was quite a bit of "Are we there?  How much longer?  I'm booooored!"  

Here is the next thing.  I have a child with Chronic Lung Disease and Asthma.  I have given him a nebulizer or inhaler every day of his life- multiple times a day.  Do you think I would remember to pack those items?  You know, the ones that help him breathe!  Nope, not a chance!  Luckily, I realized it before he was due and called a Walgreens in TN and had them call  the insurance company to get me a vacation coverage.  Super annoying but it all worked out:)  


"Smokey Moutain's Finest"  Indeed.


We got to Pigeon Forge around lunch time.  I kid you not...  our cabin was on a direct incline for 6 miles.  The roads were twisty and steep and had no guard rails.  It made us sick going up every time but it was an awesome view!  The cabin itself was perfect.  It was exactly as the pictures described and we loved everything about it.  We spent all of our time there baking Thanksgiving treats, coloring, playing pool, doing sticker books, painting, playing games, watching movies and eating.  It was everything you need to do to relax and be worry free.  The kids had so much fun and loved having their parents attention and we loved having nothing else to do but give it to them.  



 











It wouldn't be a Clark trip without a little drama.  Our last day in the mountains, I felt like Easton was acting weird.  He had a familiar deep cough, wouldn't eat and was quiet.  I kept telling Matt that something was up and of course, Matt kept telling me I was nuts.  Matt left early in the day to find me a diet coke and I had him pick up some Tylenol... just in case.  Around 6PM Easy decided to climb up in Matts lap and try to go to sleep.  At that point, Matt thought maybe we should give him some Tylenol... ya know, just in case.  Of course, I agree and get the Tylenol.  I put the dropper to his lips and he dry heaves.  For those of you that know me and my relationship with puke- you know I about died.  I tried a second time and he dry heaved again.  By this point he is burning up but I cant give him Tylenol so I laid him in his bed without a blanket and just kept checking him.  About 10pm I laid down in bed and within 5 minutes we hear him puke!  Matt and I both shot up and while Matt ran directly to him- I ran directly out the door!  I know, I know.  He is an innocent sick baby but I.Cant.Do.It.  I can't.  I don't use that word a lot but it fits here.  This sounds horrible to say but I did better standing next to him on a ventilator than I do if he pukes.  I'm sick in the head.  Thankfully, Matt is the "Throw Up Master" in our house and he accepts the role even if he doesn't like it.   Thank God.   Anyways, I did not have a thermometer (because I forgot to pack that too) but I have a hand and my hand said over 104.  This hand is pretty darn accurate.  After the big puke, I put on my big girl pants and attempted to give him Tylenol again EVEN if it meant he might puke again.  This time he took it and spared me the dry heaves.  All this means that he now had to sleep in our bed.  With a total potential to puke again.  Obviously there was no sleeping for me.  I was on alert and ready to dive out if I heard that dreaded sound.  It was a nightmare.  He finally cooled off around 1:45 and I felt I could go to sleep.  At exactly 2:30 Matt was up and ready to roll.  Awesome.  I love a 45 minute nights sleep and I'm super pleasant when that happens.  We got the kids in the car and headed home!  We drove straight through this time and the kids were fantastic.  Paige took a few naps and so did Easton.  He was so sick that I don't think he cared to make a fuss about being strapped down.  Carter NEVER fell asleep.  He stayed awake the whole time and never complained or asked to pee!  He wins the award for best traveler in the universe and he was funny.  Every once in a while he would ask which state we were in.  After guessing about four states that we could be in and being told no, he finally asked "Are we in America?!"  The answer was yes.  We were in Ohio.  If you have ever driven through Ohio- you understand that the state never ends and how he could be appalled that we were STILL in Ohio:)  I, on the other hand, did a lot of complaining and you can guess my anxiety level about being locked in a car with a potential puker.  Ahhh!  I was so happy to see Grand Blanc.

Trips and traveling (and every day life) are a little hard with kids this small but we make the best of it and don't set our expectations too high.  We had fun.  We love our little family and we will continue to make the efforts to create memories for our children year after year.

Other than Easton getting so sick, everything is going well over at the Clark house.  Carter has settled in to Kindergarten and his report card was awesome.  Mrs. Prue thinks his writing is awesome and his math impresses  the heck out of me.  I absolutely cannot believe what he has learned thus far.  Report care had all S's and P's (Secure and Progressing as expected) except for one N (needs improvement) in self control.  Hey, you can't win them all!  

















Paigey is awesome.  She is looking so big and acting older all the time.  Since we put tubes in her ears and removed her adenoids she has been healthy (yay!) and her voice has changed so much.  She is growing up and really a dream come true for me.  She's fashionable, adorable and funny.  Her sassiness is still ever present but lets be honest, who likes a wallflower?  You gotta stand out in a crowd and boy does she!

Easton is continuing to blow my mind every day.  He is talking up a storm and he thinks he is hysterical... I agree about 90% of the time:)  He had a great healthy run from August until recently.  The shake up in meds really changed his life and we are so thankful we found the right match for us in a Pulmonologist.  The biggest concern I have is how sick he gets.  He doesn't just get a cold.  He gets a temp over 104, he wheezes, he quits eating for a week, he coughs non-stop, he gets winded and his little lips turn blue.  I really feel he seems "normal" so much of the time and then when he gets sick it makes me a little sad that his body is just not up to par...YET.  We did good with this last illness.  We were able to pump him with enough drugs that it did NOT go into pneumonia which is a major victory for us.  Fingers and toes are crossed for a better winter and a real miracle would be no hospitalizations.  I believe its possible!

Typical
Matt and I are doing great.  Matt has been into CrossFit for about 9 months and loves it.  I recently decided to try.  If you aren't familiar with it- its crazy people doing insane workouts and acting like its normal.  That's my definition and its pretty spot on!  I'm in pretty good shape.  I've worked out my whole life but this.... this is scary.  I'm getting more comfortable and hopefully not embarrassing Matt too much.  I've found I'm super competitive against myself.  I'm obsessed with trying to beat my old times and weights constantly.  Its a good time.  YOU should try it!  Look out, Mr. and Mrs. Clark Fitness USA are coming after ya!

Little Loves

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The REAL Housewives.

I may or may not have a moderate addiction to the Real Housewives series on Bravo.  Beverly Hills is my favorite followed by New Jersey, Orange County, and New York.  Miami is incredibly painful to get through-however, I have been known to tune in if nothing else is on.  These woman are hysterical.  I wish some of it was more scripted but I really do think some of these people are really that crazy.  I enjoy crazy.  I have a little crazy in me and I see nothing wrong with it.  While I find this show utterly stimulating, I must tell you that they have nothing on me and my peeps.  I am a REAL housewife (with a job) and kids I manage all on my own.  I may not have a chef, a driver, a nanny, an at home gym or endless funds that I'm not so convinced they have either, but I do have three kids, a minivan, a husband I actually like a lot, and some pretty crazy days.  I certainly don't look like the Housewives on TV ( Thank the Lord!) but I do have more going on in a single day than they do.  Where is my camera crew because THIS is real life?!?!
Handsome Boys


Pretty Paige





My day yesterday seems a bit crazy when I think about.  In fact, its almost funny that this all happens in one day.  What is even funnier, its not that abnormal for a Monday around here.  My life is full.  My life is constant and fulfulling and annoying all lumped together.  Here is a glance at yesterday:  After being up with Paige every 30 minutes in the night because she is sick- I dragged my tired ass into the shower to get ready for work.  While I am getting ready, Easton takes a dive straight into the DVD player and literally dents his forehead in.  It was a knot/bruise/bloody scratch right smack dab in the middle of his forehead.  Awesome.  How he managed to land directly on the DVD player which was under a table in Carter's room, I'll never know but we don't understand half of what this kid does so whatever.  A little ice and a big kiss and I'm back to attempting to get ready.  I dropped Carter at school and made Paige a doctors appointment for the afternoon.  I should back up.  Paige had her adenoids removed and tubes put in her ears on Thursday and then had a fever Saturday, Sunday, Monday.  Of course she did.  She is my kid.  I get to work and try to hammer out a few things since I need to leave half way through the day.  Fifteen minutes after getting there I am presented with a "situation."  Without giving too much away, it resulted in my having to call the police to the daycare to have them decide which set of parents really are allowed to pick up the child.  Let me tell you how much I enjoy that. I understand that people have custody issues.  I understand its always the "other" persons fault and the  "other" parents are dangerous but please don't bring it to ME to sort out.  It's messy and my job is to keep your kid safe.  Period.  If another location could be chosen for the dispute with officers involved- that would be phenomenal.  Finally get that sorted out and I am about to hit the gym for a quick lunch hour workout (for my sanity) before I grab Paigey to run her to the doctor.  As I am walking out the door, my phone rings.  It's Carter's teacher.  The conversation goes a little something like this.  "Lindsay, Carter was hit in the chin by a flying bowling pin during gym class and its been bleeding for about 20 minutes.  I think you should come up here and take a look?  Do you mind?"  No, I'd love to.  I didn't want to workout anyway.  I'd love to evaluate a spilt open chin for stitches.  Sounds awesome.  I run up to check on his chin because after all that kids face could be his money maker one day.  We do NOT need flying bowling pins to mess that up.  I picked him up to bring him home and change his blood stained WHITE shirt.  Yes, its the only day of the year that I sent him in white.  Luckily the bleeding stopped and I thought some antibiotic cream and a bandaid would do the trick.  Phew, I wasn't exactly in the mood for ER.  ER's make me feel like I am going to pass out and of course Matt was in Detroit working.  Crisis averted.  I bought Carter some McDonalds since I thought he should have a little something special for his close call and dropped his butt back at school because we would hate to miss any academics!  Next up was Paige's appointment.  Apparently her fever is unrelated to surgery which is great.  The not so great part is that her lungs are full of junk, sounds like she is headed into Bronchitis and her Asthma is flared up.  Perfect.  She now gets two new inhalers and an antibiotic to add to my pharmacy.  All of above happened in a brief 5 hour period of time.  Never a dull moment.
Just a few daily meds for my ultra low maintenence kids.
Poor Sick Girl



















Handsome even with a band-aid chin.

I also have a friend that got locked out of her house with two kids while trying to get a much needed Diet Coke from outside.  Its worth mentioning that she was wearing hooker boots (because they were closest to the door), a hot pink robe and a Warrior Dash T-shirt.  

Then, there is my sister that has two little kids and a husband that severed his achilles tendon.  He had the surgery, moved the hospital bed into his house and hired help to get the kids to daycare in the morning since he couldn't drive.  Twice.  This literally happened twice.  He tore it again a mere four months into recovery and had to start the whole process over.  NIGHTMARE!

THIS is what I am talking about.  My peeps are real life.  Bravo's got nothin' on us!

Let's talk about Easton.  I haven't mentioned him much lately because I didn't want to jinx anything.  But, then I remembered I don't really believe in all the hocus pocus so lets celebrate.  The kid is nothing short of a crazy lunatic like no kid we have ever had before Ah-Ma-Zing!  He was so sick for so long.  It was exhausting and sad and never ending.  I'm not naive.  This is not my first dance.  I know he will have rough times but today and yesterday and the day before and the last month... He is AWESOME!  The best thing I ever did was switch his Pulmonologist and get those meds changed.  He is a different kid.  He seems normal.  Well, no.  Not normal.  He is a total spaz.  Like, crazy.  Its more than just a wild one year old.  Its pure insanity.  I'd like to think it could be because he is on the highest dose of steroids everyday that most people have ever heard of but Matt tells me that is not it.  He's just nuts.  Either way, he is doing well and happy and funny and I'll take it any day over the alternative.  I've said it once and I'll say it again:  I believe in miracles.

How can you resist?
Many years ago!
Speaking of miracles.  My best friend Kim and I performed a miracle of sorts of our own.  She was my college roommate and partner in crime.  There are few people who know me like Kim does.  I've got friends and I'm a pretty real person but Kim is that person that gets a weird intuition when something is wrong.  Shes the one that calls on a particular bad day for no reason at all.  She gets it.  She gets me.... which ain't easy.  Kim has lived in California for the last 9 years.  Its been way too long.  I'm glad she went because she had fun, met good friends and most importantly met her husband who is a gem.  However, it would have been better if she could have worked all that out in one year instead of nine.  What can I say, she didn't quite have the desired amount of pep in her step but shes coming home now so I'll move on.  Home.  Yes, as in GRAND BLANC.  Not Troy, where she is originally from but to MY hometown.  Not only did we come up with a plan to move her back to Michigan but we somehow managed to get her to move 3 miles away from me into MY SISTER'S HOUSE.  Yes, this is our finest work and we do deserve some kind of award.  I'm more than ecstatic to have her by my side physically for a change.  I'm looking forward to having a new housewife to get things rolling with.  "Old habits die hard."



Matt and I actually got to sneak away to a fabulous wedding over the weekend.  If you have ever been out with Matt, you know it was a good time:)
My favorite guy.

Our kids are SO lucky 
These dawgs were Barkin'


















Until next time, friends!

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

I'm old. Boo!

I've always looked really young for my age.  Always.  Nobody as ever accurately guessed how old I am and its always pretty comical to watch people's reaction when I tell them that not only am I not 14- I'm actually married with three kids.  One of the funnier examples that happened was when I was in the NICU with Easton and it took of one the doctors a couple of days to realize I was his Mother NOT his older sister.  Ha!  Actually made me laugh on a pretty dark day.  Thank you crazy doctor:)

This has always been a blessing and a curse.  When I was younger, I didn't feel like people took me seriously and it was annoying.  Now, I would do anything short of selling my kids to keep the youthful look.  Imagine my surprise last year when this happened:  I am laying in bed several months into my 5 month bed rest journey with Easton.  Matt comes up to keep me company and says "You've got to stop worrying so much- you are getting crows feet."  Yes.  This happened.  That gem of a husband whom we all thought was smarter than to say that to not only his wife but his pregnant wife, really made that statement.  I did not hit him and in retrospect, I really should have.  He realized pretty quickly that probably wasn't his finest move.  Anyways...  It started my new obsession with searching for lines on my face and  damnit, they are there!   Not only are they there but now I have a minivan too so I'm like super not cool and old lady status.  Before anyone forms too quick of an opinion... I obviously know there are bigger issues and problems in the world and I actually have them under my roof.  However, this is still a problem in my book and I plan on dealing with it.  Somehow, someway and with relative quickness.

What is a girl to do?  The gym/fitness part I've got down.  If there is one thing I can promise you, its that my body is not going down with my face! I happen to have control over that one.   On the night of my 30th birthday which I spent in the hospital while pregnant with Easton (thank you, son) I ordered several anti-aging cleaners, creams, eye shmutz, and whatever else Nordstrom had to offer.  I figured there was no better time than that milestone day to get started.  I've used the stuff for over a year and guess what... I don't look any better.  This morning I was scrolling through FaceBook and saw a post from Dermatologist, Dr. Michelle Legacy, "Be sure to ask your dermatologist about what anti-aging creams can and cannot do. If a cream could really prevent aging, do you think it would be available over the counter at Macy's or Target??"  Ugh.  Duped again.  Why didn't I think of that?!  Seriously.  Like a cream from Target is going to save my face.  I mean, Target can definitely save my mood but my face...probably not so much.  I'm such a sucker.  Next, I check my email and have an invitation to an interactive  beauty event to take a journey through a fountain of youth.  OK, Universe!  Stop with the hints.  I get it.  I'm getting old.  I mean, come on.  So, yes.  I'll be attending that night and of course I'll be early because only the first 50 guests get the gift bag which apparently I need since this message is coming through loud and clear.   

A lot of people are against fighting the aging process.  They say to age naturally and gracefully and beautifully.  I am not one of those people.  Those people probably sleep uninterrupted at night.   While I do not intend to get my face completely frozen in time and become unrecognizable, I am so not against helping stall the process with whatever is necessary to do so.  I feel I can still age gracefully with the help of a little modern day assistance.  It's been a good run of looking young... now I'm going to fight to keep it:)

**No, I am not off to the plastic surgeon this afternoon:)  If anyone does have some miracle cream, call me!

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

The BIG day.

 I'm usually a few days...or months behind on my posts about big events but I had to do this one now.  My brain is on overload, my OCD is outta control, my ADD is kickin' and whatever else I have self diagnosed myself with is flared up.  I'm a hot mess.  This was quite the day.  I don't even know where to begin but I've get to get this out of my head and put these thoughts somewhere where I can see them.  The house is quiet.  Matt took Easton to his sleep study, Paige and Carter are in bed and I have a Diet Coke and all the time I need to spill my guts.  Here we go.
How does this.....
...become this SO quickly.


I learned a lesson today.  You can only do so much to prepare yourself for this day.  I know its only Kindergarten but it is the first big thing he has done on his own.  Yes, he has done Preschool and PreK but I've been fortunate enough to take him to work with me for those so I was still able to kiss every boo boo and hug him whenever I wanted.  I was always in the know.  I had a hand in everything he did.  Kindergarten is a whole new story.  I know nothing.  I met the teacher for 5 seconds, one time.  I've been in the classroom one time.  I don't know how any of it works.  I don't understand how he made it from the bus to class and back to the bus.  I was worried about who would help him buy hot lunch and if he would eat it when and if he got it.  At 7PM the night before school I was at the store buying him a new pencil box because at the last minute I didn't like that the glue didn't quite fit in that box and I wanted it to close perfectly so there was no frustration.  I made sure to set the new spiderman water bottle right next to the new monogramed batman backpack because I didn't want to forget it...as if my OCD would ever allow such a thing.  We read The Kissing Hand, sprinkled our fairy dust under the pillow, said our prayers and had him asleep by 8:10PM.   I stayed up most of the night thinking about details I couldn't control and imagined a million different scenarios playing out in my head of his first day.  How he acted, what he said, who he played with, etc.  All you can do is hope that you have done a good enough job up to this point to let them spread their wings and take the challenge, the next step, give them independence and trust they will be ok.  Easier said than done.
The morning was great.  He was a little hyper but really just excited to get on that bus!
 
 


Matt and I met the bus at the school and waited in the pouring rain just to make sure he got off and into the building.  Of course, he figured it out and we stood in awe of it all.  I headed to work and kept myself busy but ran home on my lunch to upload my pictures so I could have a better look at them!  He looked just as adorable as I remembered that morning.  I could hardly wait for 4:00 to come so I could meet that bus and find out how it went!  Walking home from the bus stop he told me he had chocolate milk with lunch, that his teacher looked really pretty in her purple dress and that they had two snacks and one was super close to lunch which was "weird."  Sounded like a great first day to me:)


Exactly what I hoped to see after the first day!
Looks like a happy boy!
So the day was perfect.  Until I opened that backpack.  I should have known it was too good to be true.  Inside was a blue folder that marks daily behavior with a color system.  His little owl was circled in blue.  I immediatly start praying that blue is good.  Turns out, blue is not so good:(  It means "Think about it" or something like that.  Lets just say 7 colors on this chart and blue is third from the bottom.  My heart sunk.  How could this be?  We did everything right to prepare him.  We made sure he was organized with all his stuff, we have talked about Kindergarten for months, we quiz him on sight words and make him do workbooks- for God's sake what else could we do?!?  This is where my lesson was learned.  YOU CANNOT CONTROL EVERYTHING.  It doesn't matter how much you prepare or how many of the right things you do- its up to them to execute.  We had a long talk and after initially insisting that his teacher had the wrong kid and a threat to call and ask her about the "mix-up," the truth came out.  Apparently he kicked someone.  Really?  This can't be for real.  Carter may be hyper and bouncy and chatty and like to say words like "Booty," but kick someone... NEVER.  Evidently it happened on the rug and he doesn't know the kids name or why this went down.  (By the way, I'm practically dying at this point of interrogation.)  Regardless, we had to address this but without taking away all of the positives he had in the day.  Kicking is not, never has been, nor will ever be tolerated in my house or at school.  That point is clear.  If I can promise you one thing- its that he wont kick anyone tomorrow.  However, there are no promises as to anything else that may or may not happen in Room B.   We drilled home all the rules (of life) that he already knows.  Matt attempted to go over the color chart thingy but Carter already had that puppy memorized.  We set up an incentive that if he gets the top three colors for three days he gets a new Ninja Turtle so in other words, the stakes are pretty high over here.  Tomorrow is a new day.  We are hoping for Red but will gladly take Orange or Yellow;)  And yes, I emailed the teacher letting her know we don't take this lightly and assure her that we are all over it.  Yes, I'm crazy.  Regardless of everything, I am most proud of one thing:  Carter got on that bus and went to a school where he doesn't know anyone and had all the confidence in the world.  He never thought twice or doubted the fact that he could do it.  That makes me super proud.  We must have done something right, somewhere.  Maybe by the time our next kid goes off to school we will manage to incorporate the subject of not kicking into our rules of life.  Lets hope.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

A Little Update, A Lot of Anxiety

Easy E is at it again.  Easy E... that's funny.  That is actually the funniest nickname THIS particular child could ever have.  Ha.  He is a lot of things but EASY ain't one one 'em!  


Sweetest face.
People are always asking me what's the latest scoop with Easton so here it is.  He was doing really well for awhile and caught up pretty much completely on his developmental milestones.  He runs, jumps, climbs up and down stairs, eats with a fork and repeats anything you ask him to.  He has come so far.  However the last couple of months, his lungs have sounded terrible.  He has a terrible wet cough every single day and he kind of sounds like a purring cat most of the time.  My pediatrician and I have been concerned and so I made the decision to switch to a new Pulmonologist to get another opinion.  He agrees with us 100% that he is not recovering like he should and that his X-rays show no improvement as well as a clinical exam that was not fabulous.  There seems to be a missing link.  A reason he isn't improving.  Something a little off.  We are off to the races tomorrow to start finding that missing piece. You can't fix whats wrong if you don't know what it is.  Tomorrow we are taking him to U of M to do a sweat chloride test to rule out Cystic Fibrosis.  Do I think he has CF?  NO! Do I still have a heavy heart, lost sleep and anxiety about it even being put on the table?  Absolutely.  I just want him to be OK.  That's all.  I'm growing so tired of him always having to go through testing or not feeling well.  It's exhausting.  On Tuesday night, we are doing a sleep study.  He has rather large tonsils so they want to check for Apnea but more that that I'm interested in what his oxygen levels do at night while he is sleeping.  Neither test will hurt, both will be annoying to him and in turn to us;)  He also had a complete shake up with all of his meds and hopefully that will get him breathing a little easier.   I'm hoping to have the results of both tests by the end of next week.  Please keep that smiling face in your thoughts and lets hope we can figure something out without having to continue further testing.

My Carter Bug is headed to Kindergarten in less that two weeks!!  The Principal came and read a story, the teacher assignment arrived in the mail, school supplies are bought and meet the teacher night is next week!  How is the world is that possible.  He is excited and nervous and so am I.  I have been so lucky to have been able to take him to work with me all of these years.  I've never had to turn him over and Lord knows I'm not thrilled about that.  Time for this control freak Mom to find a little Xanax and let the little bird fly.  Yikes!  Wish me luck on that!



Mrs. Turner.  Carter's Principal.
Paigey is still Paigey.  Gorgeous, sassy and FULL of life.  She is going to move to her 3 year old Preschool room soon and has already been testing the waters with the new teachers during her visits.  You know, flat out refusing to do simple things they ask just to see what they will do.  This is what I keep noticing... at dance time, she is the "helper."  At circle time, she is the "helper."  At snack time, she is the "helper."  I'm smart enough to know that your "helpers" are typically that for a reason so you can keep a hand on them at all times and so they don't tear up your room in the meantime.  We sure do love that girl!  I admire her spunk.  She says what she wants and does what she wants... wouldn't that be great!  All jokes aside, she is all you could ever want in a little girl.  She makes my heart happy and I cannot imagine a day without her. 

And this guy... I still love him:)  


That's all for now.  I'll update with good results soon.  I just know it!



The best of the best.

Saturday, August 11, 2012

TEAM EASTON GIVES BACK BENEFIT SPEECH




THIS IS THE SPEECH I GAVE AT THE BENEFIT DINNER. I DON'T WANT TO LOSE THE MEMORIES OR THE FEELINGS SO I DECIDED TO POST IT RIGHT HERE WHERE I PRESERVE THE MOMENTS OF OUR LIFE. IF YOU MISSED THE BENEFIT- HERE'S WHAT I HAD TO SAY:)





For those of you who do not know me, my name is Lindsay Clark and I am the mother of a little boy named, Easton, who spent the first months of his life in Hurley’s Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.  I first want to start out by welcoming you to the first annual Team Easton Gives Back event and to thank you from the bottom of my heart for choosing to be here tonight.  This night is incredibly important to our family as this is one small way of trying to again say thank you for saving our son. 




 There has to be a time in your life when it is not OK to just take. There has to be a time when you must give back. When the amount or value of something you have received is too great to continue on your path without more than just acknowledgement. When this happens- you make a choice. A choice of how you are going to react. A choice to be thankful, a choice to praise God, or a choice to try and make a difference. I’m choosing all three. Words are not enough to express my gratitude. I know and I  believe that God chose to save Easton but I also believe that he had to be under exceptional care in a particular place for this to happen. The Neonatal Intensive Care Unit at Hurley Medical Center has a good reputation and for that reason alone, I chose to have my children there. Never in my plan of making a family did I picture what that unit would mean to me. Never did I understand the depth of what happens behind those locked doors. Never did I imagine my darkest hours to be in that place. That’s just not the picture your mind paints when you decide to have your perfect, little family. Sometimes life just happens. You cannot predict what your life will be like. You will never really know what is next to come or what challenges you may or may not face. All you can do is plan to the best of your ability and rise to the occasion… whatever that may be.

My experience with Hurley’s NICU changed the entire course of my life. Having a baby that you aren’t sure will survive is excruciating. There are no words to explain what that feels like. There is no preparation for this experience. I could spend my time asking the “why us” questions but that isn’t what matters. What matters is that Easton is alive. Easton fought hard. He could have easily succumbed to his illness on many occasions but he didn’t. You know why he didn’t? Because, he had a team of doctors and nurses (and family) fighting just as hard right next to him. The staff at Hurley’s NICU cared about our baby. He was not just a patient number. He was a human being deserving of a chance at life and that is exactly how they treated him. They NEVER gave up on him. They believed in him as much as we did. One of the doctors even pulled me aside as I stood with tears in my eyes next to him and said, “You know, we love him too.” I will never forget that. Ever. My point to all this is not to rehash the near tragedy of our last year but to explain to you all how fantastic this place is and to invite you to share in my attempt to support this unit.

Team Easton Gives Back is my family’s way of trying to pay it forward in the only way we can. We will never be able to repay the people that took care of and saved our baby but we can try to help make it possible that they have the things they need to continue to take care of other babies. We have decided to come together annually as a family and put on a benefit for the Hurley NICU.


I’d like to give a little background about our story because there are quite a few people here that I do not personally know.  Matthew and I have 3 children.  Our first two, Carter and Paige were born perfectly healthy.  We niavely expected our third child to be as well.  Unfortunatly that was not the case.  Easton developed PPHN shortly after birth which is a life threatening condition for newborns.  In short, it basically means that his circulatory system did not switch over after he was born and he was unable to properly oxygenate his body.  This is not very common and only occurs in about one in every thousand births.  His life was literally touch and go for the first two weeks.  We were not able to hold him for 16 days and many of those days we could not even touch him.  We had to whisper around his incubator because he was extremely sensitive to noise.  It was painful.  Each day seemed to have ups and downs but the downs were almost always outweighing the ups.  He was barely hanging on.  I’m going to share a very personal day with you that is not easy for me to talk about but I need you to understand how sick my baby was in order for you to realize what an amazing team of doctors, nurses and respiratory therapists there are in that NICU at Hurley.  You have to know where we came from when you see this sweet boy here tonight.  May 21, 2011 will forever be the most difficult day of my life thus far. Easton was three days old and having  a really bad day.  His numbers were terrible all day and it seemed like he deteriorated by the second.  I was paralyzed by fear.  I knew I was going to lose my baby but I wasn’t sure what to do about it.  I wasn’t sure how to act.  I couldn’t leave the room but I had a really hard time watching.  There were so many people surrounding his bed and you learn very quickly that the more people around the bed- the worse off you are.  Parts of the day are crystal clear and parts of it are hazey but there is an entire scene I can play in my head like a scene from a movie and it starts around 6:00pm.  Easton wasn’t doing well on a conventional ventilator so they were attempting to switch him to a high frequency ventilator and that didn’t go well either.  Matt was sitting in the blue chair staring at the chaos and I was standing directly in front of him watching his face and understanding everything that was happening just by the look in his eye.  I turned quickly only to catch a glimpse of my gray baby lying limp being bagged and I heard the conversation going on very clearly.  The doctor said that he had 15 minutes to turn around or they were air lifting him to Detroit Childrens.  The problem was that he didn’t think he would survive the flight.  It was at that time that everything stood still in my world.  I looked at Matt ,the eternal optimist, and asked if I should call the family up to the hospital and with tears in his eyes he nodded his head  yes.  My sister was in the other room and I very quietly walked in and said call the family and pack up this room.  This is it.  Something happened in the 30 minutes it took for the waiting room to fill with our family.  Prayers were answered.  Doctors and nurses efforts started to work and that baby boy fought the biggest battle any of us will ever fight and he turned himself around.  He stabilized and he did not leave this world.  Walking into the waiting room to see our family waiting for the horrific news was a devastating sight.  I was speechless and Matt had to find the words to explain that Easton was still with us.  New bonds were formed in this family in that instant.  This isn’t just something that happened to Matt and I .  This happened to every member of our family.  This was a life changing day.  New perspectives were formed on every level.  I don’t think anyone in that room will ever be exactly the same again.  I believe in God and a higher power but I know that Easton is not only alive today because of God, but because of the actions of the people in that NICU.  The next day we were obvioulsy traumatized and requested a meeting with the director, Dr. Rahman.  We were fumbling and didn’t know what to do.  All we wanted was for this baby to live and we needed someone to tell us how this was going to happen.  We thought possibly we should transfer him to someplace else not even knowing what that would entail or how that would help.  We just knew that we couldn’t have another day like the previous.  Dr. Rahman could see we were panicked and he very confidently told us that he was handling this.  He had experience with PPHN and he had a plan.  He couldn’t promise it would work but he was going to give it his all.  At that time we had no other choice but to have faith in this man that we didn’t even know and put the life of our son in his hands.  He did not disappoint.  Dr. Rahman was next to Easton’s bed almost all the time for the next few days.  He was there on his days off, he was there early in the morning and he was there late at night. He was on the phone when he wasn’t present.  The dedication to saving our baby was incredible.  And it worked.  The next several days had many fragile and scary moments.  There were so many bumps in the road but the care he received was without a doubt exceptional on every level.  This is just our story but these people do this every single day.  They are heroes and they deserve all the credit in the world.

There are so many wonderful and fantastic things that Hurley’s Neonatal Intensive Care Unit has to offer.  I’m going to have Dr. Rahman who is the director of the unit and who also personally  took care of Easton speak and give you more information about what they do.  But first, I want to talk to you about who these people really are.  They are more than just doctors and nurses doing a job.  These are some of the most compassionate, caring and comforting people you will ever meet.  It’s so difficult to be a parent of a very sick baby and not only not be able to help them but to not even be able to touch them.  Each and every doctor took time to explain to us to the best of their ability what was happening...Even if it meant using terms like “Sponge Bob Square Heart.”  They were able to make us understand what was happening but without ever misleading us or giving us false hope.  I am not sure I appreciated that then, but I certainly do now looking back.  In that situation you just want to hear that everything will be ok.  Nobody told us that.  I remember never asking the question, “Is he going to die?”, but I remember really wanting to know.  I spent a lot of time asking around that question.  I was given honest answers and often a phrase I’ll never forget which was “we are not out of the woods yet.”  It’s funny how such a common phrase turned into the most important words in my life.  Most every conversation ended with that phrase and I learned to appreciate that saying because it sort of meant that at least we were still in some kind of  woods.  May 30, 2011 was the first day of hope for me.   For starters, It was my son, Carter’s, 4th birthday and also the day I walked into find Dr. Rahman putting in a chest tube.  I immediately thought, “Here we go again,” and somehow found the courage to ask for the very first time if we would ever be out of the woods.  He looked at me and smiled.  He said “We aren’t out of the woods but we can sort of see the exit so we aren’t quite as deep.”   I thought, I’ll take it!  This was music to my ears and just what I needed to be able to head home for a quick 2 hour super hero party for my other son.  Talk about a juggling act.   There are so many other things that happened with so many amazing people.  Just a few examples would be:  Dr. Kazem.  We love you.  Easton loves you. Easton never behaved and was quickly named “Trouble” by Dr. K but for some reason whenever he was working,  Easton behaved.  I don’t know if it was because he was always threatening him or if he could just feel the positivity this man exudes.  Dr. Kazem, you brought us great comfort.  You never mislead us but you always made us feel hopeful.    We loved hearing about how much your daughters wedding was costing you and how your wife keeps you in line.  You were able to make us smile on some of our darkest days.  We needed that.   Dr. Chan never sugar coats anything.  He was so determined to figure out what was wrong in those first few days and I appreciate him holding nothing back... even if I was terrified of what he was going to say!  Roberta- Our first primary.  She was there from the start and I always felt comfortable when she had my boy.  She had to put up with me asking to hold him multiple times the first few days and she was there when they first put him on the ventilator and had to drag me out of the waiting room bathroom where I was hiding and nearly losing my mind.   You were always extremely honest with us and most importantly, I felt like you were mothering my son when I couldn’t.  I came in one day to find warmers on his feet bc  you thought he was cold and cotton rolled in his hands because his hands were getting stiff from being in a paralyzed state.  Even though he couldn’t breathe- you were worried about him being comfortable and that is a Mother’s love. Thank You.  Iris, you were the only reason I ever closed my eyes at night.  I trusted you would care for him and when it came time to challenge him by lowering settings- you weren’t scared.  You knew what he could handle and you pushed him.  I would call Iris every night and ask the same questions.  I think my favorite night was when she actually didn’t come to the phone but told the person on the line to tell me that he was fine and not to interrupt their bonding.  As a result, Iris, I would like you to know that he is the only one of my three children that still wakes up at almost 1 year old in the night.  I firmly believe this is your fault for  spoiling him in the wee hours of the night and he is still looking for you bt 2 and 3 am.    Rhonda, you are always soft spoken, incredibly sweet and such a lovely human being to be around.  There is a calmness in the air when you are working.  I remember one afternoon when everything was going smooth and all of a sudden Easton’s title volume started dropping.  Matt and I were just hanging out in our usual spot a few feet away from the bed.  You were so calm and collected that we would never have known anything was wrong except that when Cheryl came over and started bagging him- it was kind of a give away. Thanks for taking such good care of my boy.  Jessica, I know you were just doing your orientation when you took care of Easton.  I will always remember you were the one who attempted his first feeding even if it was through a feeding tube.  As a new mother yourself- I’m sure you realize how important that moment was...even if he did reject it.  I’m so glad he didn’t scare you away and I apologize on his behalf for you always having to change the tubing on his obnoxious IV pole.  We are so glad your new son can benefit from some of Easy’s hand me downs:)  Dr. Rahman:  Thank you.  Thank you for having the knowledge, confidence, and for not being afraid of taking risks.  We really feel like you took control and made it your personal mission to not let this baby die.  There are no words strong enough but please know we are forever grateful. We owe you the world.  These are just a handful of examples of the people behind the lclosed doors of Hurley’s Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.  This is their job.  They do this every, single, day.  (Please stand if you work in the NICU and lets applaud this amazing job.)

There are thousands of stories from other families that have similar experiences.  We are just one example.  We are here tonight to raise awareness of this unit.  Thank you for your support tonight and please continue to donate to Hurley’s Neonatal Intensive Care Unit as the evening continues.  





**Donations are accepted 365 days a year. Please contact Lindsay for details. Lindsaymatlock@aol.com**


Tuesday, July 10, 2012

Summer!

CRAZY
Waiting for fireworks
So, this is what I have to say:  Having three kids in four years was and still is a CRAZY idea.  I could very well end this post right there or I could ramble on and on and at the end- the same message will be clear.  I think I'll choose the rambling because my last post was forever ago.  This blogs whole purpose is to chronicle my life raising three young kids except for the the fact that I can't find the time to write it.  It's really quite the predicament.  I just put all three kids down for a nap and Lord knows that isn't going to last long so here we go...


Lately I find it so interesting how different my kids are.  They really are not alike in many ways except for their looks and then really only Carter and Paige look super similar.  I understand that Matt and I are different people and that creating these children together would give them unique personalities but seriously... who are these kids?!?  ;)  They collectively, along with Matt complete my world but they also keep it more interesting than it needs to be.  This is my family as I see them.


Always the cool kid
Carter.  He is the best looking 5 year old boy I have ever seen but he is trapped inside a teenage girls body.  The mouth on this kid is enough to make me want to pull my hair out one strand at a time.  He is always right, a little hyper, insistent on having the last word  and more stubborn than anyone I have ever met.  Matt seems to think he is just like me but I couldn't disagree more other than I MUST have the last word... which means you can imagine how Carter and I tolerate each other throughout the day! On the other hand, he is incredibly sensitive, interested in all sports and loves his Mama like nobody's business.  We may bicker all day long but before he goes to bed, right when he wakes up, when he is hurt, sad or tired- the boy needs and wants his Mama and in my book- those are the moments that count.  He is headed off to Kindergarten in the Fall and I cannot understand how he got old enough to go to school.  Better question would be how I got old enough to have a kid in Kindergarten. Huh.  Oh well, as long as I can't get a drink without being carded- I'll take it.  Although sending him off to school is frightening and a little sad, there is one part I am ecstatic about.  SCHOOL SHOPPING!  My guess is he won't care nearly as much as me but I am sure I can figure out how to make it fun for us both!


Miss Mischeivous
Paige.  If you could really get by on just looks, this girl would be in.  However, I'm trying to tell her that this is not the case.  I'm also trying to explain to her that it is completely unacceptable to pull down your pants and pee in the middle of the driveway  or poop in the backyard.  Yup, you read that right.  She really did it.  Or most recently the lesson was that you can't flush your underwear down the toilet to cover up an accident.  Ladies and Gentleman, DO NOT let the big bows and fancy dresses fool you.  Although she may like to play babies and wears whatever I dress her in, she is quite a stinker!  I have to give her credit because any time you ask her why she does something she never skips a beat and will give you a reason... even if it makes no sense.  Ex.  "Paige, why would you pee in the driveway?"  "Well, Mom, (in a voice that screams she thinks I am an idiot) I couldn't remember where I'm supposed to pee."  She just forgot after a year of potty training?  Seriously, how do I even respond to that?  She also recently tried soccer but we had to ask for a refund on that after two weeks.  Although really excited to get there, she just couldn't stop rolling around on the floor and playing with her hair bows.  Maybe next year.  Let's hope.  The most important thing about Paige is that she is funny.  I mean, really hilarious without really trying.  She says the craziest things and she must get her sense of humor from her Daddy because this girl can make you laugh all day long.  She is currently really into singing and you can hear some messed up rendition of nursery rhymes or Call Me Maybe coming from her room or the back of the car each and everyday.  She is my Ruby Girl and I can't imagine a day without her crazy antics.


Happy Boy!
Easton.  Dare I say that Easy E is acting and seeming pretty normal (gasp!) these days.  I mean, with the weird exception of his lips turning blue often even though he seems to be breathing ok and the fact that if he gets sick its guaranteed to last a whole freaking month!  Other than that, he is perfect! :)  So here is what we have recently discovered about this boy.  He fought really hard for this life and so we think he has decided to live it to the max.  When I say this, I'm really saying that this kid is nuts!  He loves to ruin drywall by ripping gates out of the wall.  That is a great pastime for him.  However, if you remove the gate, he practically jumps down the staircase.  I've tried to explain to him that he has nine lives, we get it.  Let's not press our luck.  He does the same thing on the lake or at the pool- Walks right off the edge.  I'm hoping he is just fearless as opposed to just not being very bright!  Easton is a great baby when we are in public or outside. He spends all his time speaking his crazy language to people and waving non stop with the biggest smile you have ever seen.  Life at home with Easton, not so fun.  This little boy clearly knows what he wants.  If he is not outside, he is yelling at us or standing by the door waiting for someone to take him out.  He never tires of yelling at us and does not give up easily.  I loved that trait about him when he was fighting for his life- I had no idea he was going to carry it through with EVERYTHING!  He's still my little miracle baby and I love him more than anything!


Matt and I are just trying to keep everything running smoothly.  OK, maybe smoothly isn't accurate.  We just try to keep everyone alive and somewhat happy.  It seems like our life is on full speed.  Matt is working more than ever.  Its annoying.  He left today at 5:45 and will probably get home at 5:00.  That's about his norm too.  If he isn't leaving for work super early, he is at the gym at 6:00.  He has some seriously long days and he is such a good guy that he only complains about it maybe once a month.  If that was my story, he would hear about it every single night.  So True.  I'm working three full days and either hanging with the kids the other days or running them to an appointment.  I've also been super dedicated to the gym and seeing just how strong I can get.  I tend to think I am Wonder Woman and now I am just seeing if I can really be!  Along with basketball, dance, golf and Kumon... we seem to be a bit tied up these days!  







We've got some stuff planned over the next couple of weeks.  Family time up north.  Should be a fun ride for 3 hours in the car when they all complain how long it takes to get to Fenton!  My Matty is turning 35 and we are off to celebrate in NYC.  Three quick days to see the city and then back to life on Oak Street.  It's a crazy world but I'm super proud of my family and even though some days are a little more than chaotic- I wouldn't be anywhere else!