Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The REAL Housewives.

I may or may not have a moderate addiction to the Real Housewives series on Bravo.  Beverly Hills is my favorite followed by New Jersey, Orange County, and New York.  Miami is incredibly painful to get through-however, I have been known to tune in if nothing else is on.  These woman are hysterical.  I wish some of it was more scripted but I really do think some of these people are really that crazy.  I enjoy crazy.  I have a little crazy in me and I see nothing wrong with it.  While I find this show utterly stimulating, I must tell you that they have nothing on me and my peeps.  I am a REAL housewife (with a job) and kids I manage all on my own.  I may not have a chef, a driver, a nanny, an at home gym or endless funds that I'm not so convinced they have either, but I do have three kids, a minivan, a husband I actually like a lot, and some pretty crazy days.  I certainly don't look like the Housewives on TV ( Thank the Lord!) but I do have more going on in a single day than they do.  Where is my camera crew because THIS is real life?!?!
Handsome Boys

Pretty Paige

My day yesterday seems a bit crazy when I think about.  In fact, its almost funny that this all happens in one day.  What is even funnier, its not that abnormal for a Monday around here.  My life is full.  My life is constant and fulfulling and annoying all lumped together.  Here is a glance at yesterday:  After being up with Paige every 30 minutes in the night because she is sick- I dragged my tired ass into the shower to get ready for work.  While I am getting ready, Easton takes a dive straight into the DVD player and literally dents his forehead in.  It was a knot/bruise/bloody scratch right smack dab in the middle of his forehead.  Awesome.  How he managed to land directly on the DVD player which was under a table in Carter's room, I'll never know but we don't understand half of what this kid does so whatever.  A little ice and a big kiss and I'm back to attempting to get ready.  I dropped Carter at school and made Paige a doctors appointment for the afternoon.  I should back up.  Paige had her adenoids removed and tubes put in her ears on Thursday and then had a fever Saturday, Sunday, Monday.  Of course she did.  She is my kid.  I get to work and try to hammer out a few things since I need to leave half way through the day.  Fifteen minutes after getting there I am presented with a "situation."  Without giving too much away, it resulted in my having to call the police to the daycare to have them decide which set of parents really are allowed to pick up the child.  Let me tell you how much I enjoy that. I understand that people have custody issues.  I understand its always the "other" persons fault and the  "other" parents are dangerous but please don't bring it to ME to sort out.  It's messy and my job is to keep your kid safe.  Period.  If another location could be chosen for the dispute with officers involved- that would be phenomenal.  Finally get that sorted out and I am about to hit the gym for a quick lunch hour workout (for my sanity) before I grab Paigey to run her to the doctor.  As I am walking out the door, my phone rings.  It's Carter's teacher.  The conversation goes a little something like this.  "Lindsay, Carter was hit in the chin by a flying bowling pin during gym class and its been bleeding for about 20 minutes.  I think you should come up here and take a look?  Do you mind?"  No, I'd love to.  I didn't want to workout anyway.  I'd love to evaluate a spilt open chin for stitches.  Sounds awesome.  I run up to check on his chin because after all that kids face could be his money maker one day.  We do NOT need flying bowling pins to mess that up.  I picked him up to bring him home and change his blood stained WHITE shirt.  Yes, its the only day of the year that I sent him in white.  Luckily the bleeding stopped and I thought some antibiotic cream and a bandaid would do the trick.  Phew, I wasn't exactly in the mood for ER.  ER's make me feel like I am going to pass out and of course Matt was in Detroit working.  Crisis averted.  I bought Carter some McDonalds since I thought he should have a little something special for his close call and dropped his butt back at school because we would hate to miss any academics!  Next up was Paige's appointment.  Apparently her fever is unrelated to surgery which is great.  The not so great part is that her lungs are full of junk, sounds like she is headed into Bronchitis and her Asthma is flared up.  Perfect.  She now gets two new inhalers and an antibiotic to add to my pharmacy.  All of above happened in a brief 5 hour period of time.  Never a dull moment.
Just a few daily meds for my ultra low maintenence kids.
Poor Sick Girl

Handsome even with a band-aid chin.

I also have a friend that got locked out of her house with two kids while trying to get a much needed Diet Coke from outside.  Its worth mentioning that she was wearing hooker boots (because they were closest to the door), a hot pink robe and a Warrior Dash T-shirt.  

Then, there is my sister that has two little kids and a husband that severed his achilles tendon.  He had the surgery, moved the hospital bed into his house and hired help to get the kids to daycare in the morning since he couldn't drive.  Twice.  This literally happened twice.  He tore it again a mere four months into recovery and had to start the whole process over.  NIGHTMARE!

THIS is what I am talking about.  My peeps are real life.  Bravo's got nothin' on us!

Let's talk about Easton.  I haven't mentioned him much lately because I didn't want to jinx anything.  But, then I remembered I don't really believe in all the hocus pocus so lets celebrate.  The kid is nothing short of a crazy lunatic like no kid we have ever had before Ah-Ma-Zing!  He was so sick for so long.  It was exhausting and sad and never ending.  I'm not naive.  This is not my first dance.  I know he will have rough times but today and yesterday and the day before and the last month... He is AWESOME!  The best thing I ever did was switch his Pulmonologist and get those meds changed.  He is a different kid.  He seems normal.  Well, no.  Not normal.  He is a total spaz.  Like, crazy.  Its more than just a wild one year old.  Its pure insanity.  I'd like to think it could be because he is on the highest dose of steroids everyday that most people have ever heard of but Matt tells me that is not it.  He's just nuts.  Either way, he is doing well and happy and funny and I'll take it any day over the alternative.  I've said it once and I'll say it again:  I believe in miracles.

How can you resist?
Many years ago!
Speaking of miracles.  My best friend Kim and I performed a miracle of sorts of our own.  She was my college roommate and partner in crime.  There are few people who know me like Kim does.  I've got friends and I'm a pretty real person but Kim is that person that gets a weird intuition when something is wrong.  Shes the one that calls on a particular bad day for no reason at all.  She gets it.  She gets me.... which ain't easy.  Kim has lived in California for the last 9 years.  Its been way too long.  I'm glad she went because she had fun, met good friends and most importantly met her husband who is a gem.  However, it would have been better if she could have worked all that out in one year instead of nine.  What can I say, she didn't quite have the desired amount of pep in her step but shes coming home now so I'll move on.  Home.  Yes, as in GRAND BLANC.  Not Troy, where she is originally from but to MY hometown.  Not only did we come up with a plan to move her back to Michigan but we somehow managed to get her to move 3 miles away from me into MY SISTER'S HOUSE.  Yes, this is our finest work and we do deserve some kind of award.  I'm more than ecstatic to have her by my side physically for a change.  I'm looking forward to having a new housewife to get things rolling with.  "Old habits die hard."

Matt and I actually got to sneak away to a fabulous wedding over the weekend.  If you have ever been out with Matt, you know it was a good time:)
My favorite guy.

Our kids are SO lucky 
These dawgs were Barkin'

Until next time, friends!

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